8/8/2014. I was on the 8th day of what I thought was supposed to be a 23 day fast. God broke it, when He Broke me. Visiting a healing service at MOBCC at the request of my sister, not knowing what to expect and not sure if I was really expecting anything at all. I was overwhelmed by the worship of the saints standing in faith. I was overcome by fresh perspective on the everlasting and living Word brought by the man of God.
But the kicker was at the altar, tears streaming down my face hearing the Spirit of God saying to me “Stop Begging for What’s Already Yours.” “ If you want to keep on eating this way for your health fine, BUT STOP BEGGING FOR WHAT’S ALREADY YOURS”.
Now yall, know I praise and you might even see me cry, but little Miss Reserved here, aint that demonstrative a person, but a scream came out of my spirit that I was not sure even belong to me and a release came over me like never before. Still I tried to press closer and press closer looking for an extra touch from the man of God for my son. Parts of me still desperate. I hear the Spirit speak to me again “Is it him or Is it Jesus?” Of course I say Jesus, and I hear in my soul “You aint the woman looking for the crumbs from the table.. STOP BEGGING FOR WHAT’S ALREADY YOURS”
And then there was the call to sow a sacrificial seed. Not really having it but walking in faith, I go to sow mine. Thinking “here Lord”. And then I heard it “ You know you can’t buy a miracle right”.. I was like yes Lord, I know. And then again I hear again “STOP BEGGING FOR WHAT’S ALREADY YOURS”
So finally I surrender to my seat and just lift my hands in worship finally surrendering to what God was telling me. I felt the need to remove the shoes because “this was Holy Ground”. I surrender all fears, and creeping doubts, and misunderstanding to receive what was already mine.
Would you know it, as soon as I did, the man of God ended the service but on the way out he pulled my son and I aside and took us back into private chambers , away from the crowd, to lay hands on us. He proclaimed what was ALREADY OURS and said that what we were to be prepared for was a RECOVERY EFFORT to BRING BACK WHAT IS ALREADY OURS.
All I can say I am glad my sisters had my shoes and my purse or I would have ran out without them. .. On the 8 day of the 8 month on the 8 day of a fast, God gave me a new beginning. NO MORE BEGGING FOR WHAT’S MINE….. WE ARE NOW ON A RECOVERY MISSION.