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Does It Still Hurt?

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   Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe.”                      John 20-27 NIV

 Our topic for the day was “God is Not Picking On You…..Trials Vs. Temptations.” It started as a lesson on discerning the difference between trials and temptations and how to rejoice in the trials that God gives you.   However, very quickly, it turned into a discussion of past hurts, disappointments, and especially abuses in childhood.

As I watched several people compare stories and physical scars, instinctively I glanced at a recent one on my arm.  A footprint shaped burn I received thinking I could cook a meal for my family the day after my youngest grandchild took his flight for heaven.

Forgetting I was the one teaching the class,   my eyes began to well up on me, but the Holy Spirit nudged me to look again and then asked, “Does it Still Hurt?”

I was like “Of course Lord, it still hurts”.

“No, Chelle. You really mean that 6 month old scar still hurts?”

“No, Lord, of course the scar doesn’t hurt.”

“Okay then, give me all of it.”

Uggh, I felt it in my spirit and I asked the class and I asked you, the same question the Holy Spirit asked me.    “Does it still hurt?”

In John Chapter 20:25, Thomas makes a bold statement, “Unless I see in His hands the imprint of the nails, and put my finger into the place of the nails, and put my hand into His side, I will not believe.  This was even after Jesus had appeared to several of his fellow disciples during the 8 days since the crucifixion proclaiming that everything Jesus has said would happen had come.

Jesus had forewarned that He would take the sins and sickness of His people to the cross.  That He would take on the pains of abuse, disappointment and despair.  That He would whip these things to naught and deliver them and death to the gates hell, while snatching the keys from satan so that nothing the devil had could really win over us.  And as evidence of His work, he broke the grave wide open and showed that freedom from all manner of trial and temptation could walk the earth.

However, how many of us now need to take on the title of “doubting” that history has given Brother Thomas? How many of us have received the written, heard, and Rhema Word of God and been flooded with the freeing testimonies of how others have seen the Lord move in their lives, yet still keep looking down at our scars declaring  disbelief until we receive a full manifestation with our own eyes.

Jesus is still reaching out to you saying, “Reach here with your finger, and see My hands; and reach here your hand and put it into My side; and do not be unbelieving, but believing.”…

He wants you to know, that though yes there is a scar on your body and your heart that evokes a memory that will move you…….and yes, He understands because He was touched with every trial and temptation you face….., it is paramount that you understand that He bears scars on His hands, feet, and side that are witness that He took it all for you.   He doesn’t want you to carry the burden any longer. He does not want you to smell like smoke though you have been singed by  the fires of life.

When Jesus, invited Thomas to “Thrust his fingers into His side”, Jesus was still bearing the evidence of His wounds (aka your wounds), yet they could not have possibly hurt to the touch if he would allow Thomas to do so.

In essence, Jesus was reaffirming that it was possible to be bruised, beaten, broken and horribly scarred, yet be so healed in the promises of God that the discolorations and disfiguration become “smoothed out proof” that God’s Living Word is still living.

Jesus wants you to receive that gift from Him.   He took it.  He bears the scars.  He gives you the freedom from what life delivered.   Though you bear evidence of it, He does too.   And since His wounds healed, so did yours.  That moment when we trust in Him enough to give the pain to Him, even when we can still see and feel the scar, He will take that anomaly on your heart and make it a tattoo of your testimony instead.  He will make you a walking, talking, scar bearing evidence that He is very much alive!!!!

Got Lessons ?

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I woke up early (as usual) almost on the verge of tears, not because I am missing her so much today (she left us on Valentines 2000), but because in a dream she asked me, “Have you gotten the lessons yet?” So I began to think about the last day before she slipped away :

In our very last full conversation she attempted to tell me (a married woman with 3 young kids at time) the birds and the bees. We cracked each other up on that one.

In the emergency room, she eyes the ginger ale I was drinking and says she is thirsty. I offer her mine and she says no, ” bring me a fresh one, one of my own.”

She warns me, in her own way, that it would be her last Valentines, “wash my face, I have a date with Jesus”

Finally, her last statement was “go on now, you got work to do”.

Lesson 1: You are Never too Old to Learn or Laugh
Lesson 2: Only quench your thirst in life with the very best available to you.
Lesson 3: Make Jesus the most important relationship of your life and be prepared for the date!
Lesson 4: Always walk in your calling, though sometimes it hurts.

Thank you Mama, still taking care of me beyond space, time and distance. Enjoy your hula!

NO NEED FOR FALLING

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Now all glory to God, who is able to keep you from falling away and will bring you with great joy into His glorious presence without a single fault. – Jude: 1:24.

It is that time of year again!

As I reflect, I note times so painful in 2015 that I literally lost my senses of smell, touch, and taste and the ability to produce tears. I suppose it was in an effort to protect myself from all I was experiencing. First, as I presided over my dad’s funeral. Again while anointing with oil of myrrh the lifeless body of my youngest grandchild. Once more, as my 37 year old sister suffered a debilitating stroke.

In these moments, I was internally, silently screaming at God, “Why do you trust me with so much pain?” I felt Him whispering back to me, “Just know to trust Me more”.

And then, there were times so joyful that I thought I would burst. My son received a hearing restorative device after 3 years of silence. I found siblings I didn’t know I had. Met new friends and reconnected with old; financial windfalls, and the acquisition of a debt free building for our ministry.

In these moments, I would be humbled by the blessings of God and ask,” Why do you trust me with so much goodness?” And He would whisper to me, “Just Know to Trust Me More.

Reminds me very much of that old “trust exercise” where you allow yourself to just fall back and hope that the one behind you was willing to and strong enough to catch you. Without a doubt, the One Who Is Mighty to Save is fully able and entirely willing to catch you and not only that, He is able to keep you from falling in the first place.

In every moment, those in which I thought my soul could not go on and in those where I thought it could fly, God has always been there to keep me from falling. He has always known how much I could take and how much I could receive. How much I could bear and how often He would have to carry my weight. In all of this, He was wooing me to “Trust Him More”.

It is easy to just trust? No,not always. Pain can tempt us to shrivel away and blessings can tempt us to be full of ourselves. But when we turn our focus to the “One who is able to keep us from falling away” levels of faith increases and the process more sure. Every day, I must choose to see Him as my Source, my Backbone, and my Back-Up I find myself repeating over and over, “ To Him who is able to keep me from falling… into sin, from falling into despair, from falling into pride, from falling into debt, from falling into sickness..” And so on and so on

That trust is empowering when we remember that it also carries a promise of “great joy into His glorious presence without a single fault”. Imagine being invited into the Presence of the Almighty…. Into His Love, His Care, His Healing and His Provision….knowing full well that you are unworthy and incapable …only to have Him say “ Come on in, I see no fault in you”. Selah on that one, will you! Now receive the joy from the knowing!

So as I prepare my set for praise and worship at midnight tonight, the song that immediately comes to mind hails from Hillsong’s Darlene Zschech. The lyrics of the chorus sum up 2015 and gives me peace about 2016:

“Though Mountains Fall, I’ll Stand
By the Power of Your Hand
And In Your Heart of Hearts I’ll Dwell
And This My Soul Knows Very Well”

Yes to Him who is able to keep me from falling!!!!! This my soul knows very well!

A First Timer’s Thanksgiving

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I am at my desk quietly interceding for people who are struggling  missing someone on their “first thanksgiving without them”.

I know how they feel.  My dad, Jerry,  won’t be here for the first time to tell me how much my sweet potato pie reminds him of his mother’s.  I won’t be visiting grandma, Anna,  for the first time at the nursing home and hearing “There’s My Pretty  Brown Girl”.  Nor will I be sneaking baby Emmanuel his first taste, for the first time, of something he would be too young to eat.

Threefold pains aside, I am spending Thanksgiving being grateful for the touch that each of these individuals placed on my heart and my life…whether over the course of many years or just one gracious hour. Thankful for the first times with them and the lasts.

The best way for me to  honor their memories is to live life fully and  with full expectation and wonder.  The best way to thank God for their presence is to see that the blessings I have received from them far outweigh the sorrows of being temporarily apart from them.   Some glorious  “Forever Thanksgiving Day” will be ours for the first time….. someday.

For now, my prayers are with those other “first timers” who need to feel those same blessings and to be rewarded with the smiles and laughter that come from precious memories.

If you are missing a parent, then be there for someone who is missing their child.   If you are missing a child, then be there for someone who is missing a parent.   You get the idea!  The measure that you pour out will be returned to you.

I also  want to encourage those who don’t know what this feels like, to one…..be thankful….. and two…. be kind enough to “step in for a first timer” this holiday season.  Don’t discount their feelings, but volunteer to surrogate a broken heart and make sure they don’t struggle alone.

So for now, I will make one extra sweet potato pie…….. and will eat the heck out of a slice for my dad.  Then, I will put on my best dress and make Anna proud.  I then (when nobody is looking) will  be pulling out a tiny spoonful of mashed potatoes for my grandbaby.

As the joy of being thankful fills my heart, I pray the same for you.  Happy thanksgiving!.

Love Always, Chelle

 

 

ON THE SUBJECT OF PINK POLKA DOTTED ELEPHANTS

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Source: ON THE SUBJECT OF PINK POLKA DOTTED

Pink Polka Dotted Elephants.  That is what I call thoughts that come from out of nowhere to distract you from focusing on what is right and good. The Bible instructs us to think on those things that are lovely, things that are pure, and are in line with the Word of God.  It instructs us know that God has a plan for our good and our welfare.

But tonight, after taking my usual bedtime routine of potions, pills and injections and all the other expensive crap designed to keep me breathing …. along came that stupid elephant in the room.

No…. I wasn’t high off of anything… LOL.   He had come to visit because someone had posed the question earlier “Are You Afraid Of Dying Young?”.  I didn’t answer the human who said it…. but apparently inquiring devils wanted to know.

I tried quoting reaffirming scripture after scripture in my head to make the stupid thought go away.   “Jesus Bore My Sickness and Carried My diseases and By His Stripes I am Healed. “I shall live and not die but declare the works of the Lord”. But to no avail….the little imp was determined to interrupt my sleep.

So here is how I answered to make him run back into his imaginary evil world.  NO….I am not afraid of dying young… but rather I am more afraid of PEOPLE who will watch me grow old but try to make me live like I am dying.

They  mean well.. but do they really have to remind me of how bad I look every time they see me.  Yes,   I know what the doctors said.. But I also know what Jesus died for.  My symptoms are just that, symptoms of lying vanities……. because I know I am already healed.   Whether it manifests for you to see is not my problem or God’s.  Could you please just rejoice in the hope and testimony I am aiming for?  And No, I am not putting down my microphone.  I am pretty sure my head wont explode while hitting a high note.  And yes, I laugh and think it is funny that you don’t know me well enough to know that I don’t intend to lay myself away and just accept anything.

Pink Polka Dotted Elephants In the Room beware the Overcomer has come!   You may not  always be able to  ignore the silly thoughts the devil sends.  But remember the devil knows that he has already lost (big dummy)…. he is just trying to trick you into focusing on lies and stupidity. The only way he can beat you is if you allow your imagination to run in his direction.   Address  those contradicting thoughts what with you know to be true about God’s Word instead….thoughts of healing, prosperity, love and dreams of the good things God wants for you in a life more abundantly.

So enough of the elephants .  Back to hell’s zoo they go!  For Good this time.

 

 

 

To Hear God

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To Hear God

My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me: John 10:27 (KJV)

Today is a really big day in my household and even as I write this, I am blinded by tears of joy and thankfulness.

My youngest son, Isaiah, has been enveloped in near silence for almost three years, due to profound deafness caused as a consequence of chronic kidney failure. In fact, it was the sudden on-set hearing loss that sent us to the doctors and contributed to saving his life as he was showing no other symptoms of the killer poison flowing through his veins.

As if it were not bad enough that he had to immediately begin a 3 day a week , 4 hours at a time dialysis treatment, his hearing was also going away more and more each day. Yet, he endured without complaint. I was so amazed at the end of each doctor visit, even with a degrading prognosis, that his only question was “Will I still be able to play my drums?”

In the midst of impending and impeding silence, he still joyfully committed himself to continuing to play the drums for our church praise services every single Sunday he was physically able to. Sometimes, even when he could only feel the vibrations from the other instruments or by merely reading my lips for context clues in a song.

As the situation began to deteriorate and he had been denied aggressive treatment until his kidney situation stabilized, I found myself often praying, “Lord, if he can’t hear my voice, at least let him be able to hear yours.”

I have seen evidence of this hearing of the Lord’s voice in his life over and over again during the past three years. It is loud each time I hear him proclaim that he is already healed by Christ stripes. It is clearly audible with each banging on his beloved drums. It is the loudest whisper each time I watch my boy go off into surgery or to his regular dialysis treatments… again without complaint.

Today’s question is simply this: how do we react when it seems like God has gone silent? When it seems like the poisons of daily stresses, situations and hope deferred block our ability to hear His voice? Or when it seems like the voice of the enemy (or maybe even our own) seems louder than the last thing we heard God say?

Do we turn back, fall apart, stop cold in our tracks or blame God for not answering the way we wanted? Or do we, like my son, Isaiah: wait patiently, proclaim the Word, and continue to be faithful to the last instruction God gave?

I know the silence is tough and waiting is not an easy thing. Trust me, I have had to rebuke myself a few times over the past few years for not being more like my son in this situation. But true to His Word, God will come and His Word will not return void. Isaiah 35: 3-7 tells us to “Encourage the exhausted, and strengthen the feeble. Say to those with anxious heart, “Take courage, fear not. Behold, your God will come with vengeance; The recompense of God will come, But He will save you.” Then the eyes of the blind will be opened And the ears of the deaf will be unstopped.…”

It is a surety that you can count on. He will speak and He will answer and He will be heard by those who are willing to follow.

Which brings me back to today. After three years of waiting, therapy and surgery, Isaiah’s cochlear implant was turned on today with a special processor that restored hearing in one ear.

Yes, of course I cried when he confirmed that he heard me. I belly laughed as he blessed my sister and my Pastor by calling them first as he was able to use a phone for the first time in all these years.

My prayer for Isaiah has changed now. “Lord, even though he can hear my voice again, let him hear Your Voice even louder.”

Prayer:
Father God, we thank you, in the Name of Jesus, for all that You have said and all that You will say to us. Help us to walk in joy and patience as we proclaim your Word over every situation and circumstance. Help us, by the Holy Spirit’s guidance, to remain faithful to the last instruction you gave us, whether by th written Word , prophecy or by the gifts you have instilled in us. We thank you for the blessing of hearing your voice and we gladly commit to follow in Jesus’ Name, Amen.

LIVE! LIVE! LIVE

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LIVE! LIVE! LIVE!

The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy.I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance (to the full, till it [a]overflows). John 10:10 (Amplified Bible)

I have just returned from an off Broadway adaptation of the musical, “Mame. “ The story chronicles the life, love, joys and pains faced during the Great Depression era of an eccentric auntie and her beloved nephew, who have been forced together by tragedy. The recurring theme exclaimed was “Life is a banquet and most people are starving to death. Live! Live! Live!”

This same reminder needs to be shouted out to even the children of God. In John 10:10, Jesus declares that He came that we may have life and have it in abundance. A full life! A life that over flows!

Sadly, (and oddly enough) we, who have been given full permission in Christ to love living, oftentimes muddle through in an existence that maintains a day to day without dreams and desires. Have you heard yourself say “maybe tomorrow” or “when the time is right?” Or have you declared yourself too old, too tired, or too broke to chase a possibility?

Well, have you? Have you chosen to allow the enemy to steal, kill, and destroy the life that Christ died to give you? Have you allowed yourself to be buried alive by limiting God’s plans for you by your own insecurities and doubts?

In Jeremiah 29:10-11 (NIV) God assures, that “I will come to you and fulfill my good promise……..plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Wow, what a guarantee!!!!

So I encourage you (and myself) today, …right now….dust off those dreams and plans! Step out in faith on those desires that God put in your heart. His life…..Christ’s precious life offered at the table of Calvary…. Is yours for the feasting! LIVE! LIVE! LIVE!

Prayer:
Father, in the Name of Jesus, I thank you for the sacrifice of the life of Christ in exchange for mine. I askyou today to give me the wisdom and courage to walk in the newness and abundance that was purchased on my behalf. Help me to live the life Christ died to give me. I thank you for the guarantee of a life to the full and I receive it with great joy. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.