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Even Though


So I was listening to Scripture, already sitting in the middle of a situation that felt heavy, when that line from Psalm 23:4 came through: “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death…” And it stopped me. Because what I’m in right now doesn’t feel like a shadow of death… but it sure does feel like a shadow of change.

And that part hit me sideways. “Yea, though…” but all I could hear was even though. Not churchy. Not polished. Just plain and honest.

Even though this is not how I thought this season would look.
Even though things are shifting whether I’m ready or not.
Even though what used to feel steady doesn’t feel as steady right now.
Even though I’m trying to hold it together and trust God at the same time.
Even though.

Because “even though” doesn’t mean I’m ignoring the valley. It means I see it real clear, and I’m still walking. Not skipping. Not shouting. Just walking… through a shadow of change I didn’t ask for.

Isaiah 43:2 reminds me that when I pass through the waters, He will be with me. Through it, not around it. And if I’m being honest, I definitely asked for around it.

Then there’s Habakkuk 3:17–18, that grown-woman kind of faith. Though nothing is budding, though things aren’t producing like they should, yet I will rejoice. Not loud. Not for show. Just a quiet choice between me and God.

And 2 Corinthians 4:8–9—pressed, perplexed, struck down… yeah, that part. But not crushed. Not destroyed. Still here.

Somewhere between “Lord, help me” and “I trust You,” there’s this quiet sentence that keeps showing up: even though… I’m still going to trust You. Not because I’ve got answers, but because I’ve got Him.

And here’s something I’m holding onto… shadows shift when something is moving. So maybe this shadow of change means God is doing more than I can see right now.

God sees you. Not the put-together version, the real one. The one doing math in her head. The one holding her breath waiting on answers. The one choosing not to fall apart when it would make sense to. He sees your even though… and He hasn’t stepped out of it.

Love, Chelle
defygravitywithoutwings.com

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Even When It Still Looks Like Just Dirt

I found myself out in the garden with my uncle the other day. Him just starting his own, looking at me like I was some kind of expert.

I almost laughed.

Because just a little while ago, I was the one Googling, guessing, and hoping something—anything—would grow.

But there I was… walking him through it. Pointing to each plant. Naming what was what. Explaining what needed covering, what needed watering, what needed just a little more time—especially with that unexpected return to winter creeping back into the forecast.

“Watch this one.” “Protect that one.” “This one’s doing just fine.”

And then we got to those two patches. Just… buckets of dirt.

No green. No signs of life. No proof that anything had taken root at all.

I didn’t have a confident answer for those. I didn’t know if it was bad seed.Didn’t know if it was timing. Didn’t know if something had already failed before it ever had a chance to show itself.

But I heard myself say it anyway: “Give it two more weeks.”

Not because I had evidence… but because I understood something deeper. Everything that looks like nothing  isn’t nothing.

Some things take longer to break through. Some growth happens where you cannot see it first. Some seeds are doing their most important work in the dark. 

And maybe that’s where I am too.

Not behind.

Not forgotten.

Just… still becoming.

God is not rushing this season.

He is tending to me with intention—even in the places that look like bare soil.

Especially there.

Say this aloud with me:

I am not behind. I am not forgotten.

God is tending to me with intention, even in the quiet places.

What is meant for me is still growing, even when I cannot see it yet.

Isaiah 30:15

“In quietness and trust is your strength.”

Galatians 6:9

“Let us not grow weary in doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.”

Dear God,

Thank You for the places in my life that are growing even when I cannot see them.

Help me trust You in the waiting, in the wondering, and in the not knowing.

Give me patience for what is still beneath the surface, and faith to believe that nothing You’ve planted in me is wasted.

Remind me that I am not behind—I am still becoming.

Amen.

God sees you… trusting the soil, even when it looks like dirt.

Love, Chelle

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The Place My Name Found Me

I went forward like everyone else.

Not rushed. Not hesitant. Just… carried.

I was visiting the early service at my son’s church,  when the  Pastor called us to come sign our names on the wooden cross that had been standing since last week’s Easter service. A simple act. A physical way to mark what God had already done.

But nothing about it felt simple.

Tears started before I ever stepped out.

I watched the seniors go first
Slow steps
Steady hands
Lives the world sometimes overlooks
But heaven still calls by name

I saw the former addict sign
Not as who they were
But as who God kept

I saw those once incarcerated
Writing their names like chains had finally agreed to let go

A blind man signed
A woman limping signed
And my own deaf son… signed

Lord… that alone almost took me out

Each name wasn’t just written
It was declared
Healing
Freedom
Promise
Still in progress, but already claimed

The children came excited
Unafraid of space running out
Because children always believe there’s room

And when space did get tight
The Pastor lifted the cross higher
So those who couldn’t bend could still reach

Even at the feet… there was still room

That part preached all by itself

But what stayed with me…
What lingered…
Was where my hand landed

A rough place
Scratched
Uneven
The kind of spot that, if you rubbed it the wrong way, could leave a splinter

And I paused

Because it felt like my life

Not smooth
Not polished
Not presentation-ready

But still part of the cross

And right there, in that imperfect place
I wrote my name

Careful
Intentional
Fully aware

That Jesus didn’t die for smooth stories

He died for splinters too

For the places that still catch
Still sting
Still remind you that healing isn’t always pretty

And yet…

That rough place held my name just fine

Didn’t reject me
Didn’t shift me to a better spot

It received me
As-is

And I heard it clear as day in my spirit

“You don’t need a polished place to belong here.”

So I signed

Not because I have it all together

But because the cross already made room for every part of me that doesn’t

“By His wounds we are healed.” — Isaiah 53:5

Signing your name in places that don’t feel smooth yet
Trusting God with the parts of your story that still feel rough
Believing that even here… you belong

**Love, Chelle**
defygravitywithoutwings.com

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Worship Beyond The Song

Worship is easy when the music is right,
the lights are soft, and nobody has touched your wounds that day.

But real worship?
Real worship sounds different.
It sounds like forgiving while your heart is still tender to the touch. It looks like choosing God when people are still choosing to bruise you.

Because worship was never just a song…
it’s a decision. A decision to trust that God is still good even when people are not.

And we saw it—not in a sanctuary, but on a cross.

When Jesus looked at the very people who were crucifying Him and said, “Father, forgive them…” (Luke 23:34)

Not after it was over. Not when it stopped hurting. While it was happening.


Sometimes worship looks like the opposite of what we expected:
Forgiving when you’re still hurting.
Praying when you’re disappointed.
Trusting when nothing makes sense.
Giving when you feel empty.
Staying when it would be easier to walk away.
Walking away when it would be easier to stay.
Being kind to people who mishandled you.
Keeping your heart soft in a hard situation.
Choosing peace when chaos would feel justified.
Telling the truth when a lie would protect you.
Resting when pressure says perform.
Waiting when everything in you wants to rush.
Obeying when you don’t understand.
Loving without getting anything back.
Letting go of what you prayed would stay.
Thanking God before you see the outcome.
Showing up again after being let down.
Keeping your integrity when nobody is watching.
Not clapping back when you have the perfect comeback.
Blessing people who bruised you.
Believing God is still good on a bad day.
Choosing joy without evidence.
Honoring God privately, not just publicly.
Surrendering your version of how it should go.
Standing still when fear says run.
Moving forward when comfort says sit down.

Because sometimes the most powerful worship isn’t what you sing in a moment of peace… it’s what you choose in the middle of pain.


It’s saying:
“God, I honor You… not because this feels good, but because You are good.”

So yes, worship Him even while the bruise is still fresh.

Not because they deserve it.But because He does.

“In quietness and trust shall be your strength.”
— Isaiah 30:15


God, teach me how to worship You beyond what is comfortable. When my heart is bruised, help me not to harden it.

When I don’t understand what You’re allowing, help me trust who You are.

Give me the strength to forgive even when the pain is still fresh, and the courage to release what is trying to take root in me that You never planted.

Let my life honor You not just in my songs,
but in my choices.

Even here. Even now.

Amen.

Love, Chelle
DefyGravityWithoutWings.com

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His April Faithfulness

Even though today is April Fool’s Day…
for me, it marks something completely different.

Twenty-one years ago, I went from being a near-homeless divorcee with three kids in tow to becoming a homeowner in 90 days.

And I still smile when I think about it. Because I was so careful not to say anything that might disrupt what God was doing, that every time someone asked me, “Chelle, what are you going to do?” I would simply say, “I’ll tell you on Wednesday.”

There was nothing special about Wednesdays… except that it gave me somewhere to place my expectation.

And sure enough—every Wednesday—
God gave me something to say.
A step. A shift. A provision. A testimony.

So I kept showing up to Wednesdays. And when I finally walked into that house, on April Fools Day,  I found a Bible waiting for me.

Inside was a note from the selling  realtor that said: “Your bid was not the highest, but in 1955 this house was built for you. God has blessed it. Enjoy”

Confirmation of what I already knew.
This wasn’t luck.
This wasn’t timing.
This was God.

And here I am, twenty-one years later…
on another Wednesday.
Still standing.
Still provided for.
Still carried.

And if I’m being honest… at 2 a.m. this morning, life tried to get loud again.
Decisions. Pressure. Finances.
The kind of weight that makes your head hurt and your chest feel tight.

But somewhere between the worry and the whisper,  I found my footing again.

And this is what I stood on:
Lord, I trust You more than this situation.
Lord, I trust You more than what this situation is trying to tell me.
Lord, I trust You more than how I feel right now.
Lord, I trust You more than my need to control how this turns out.
Lord, I trust You to take care of me… no matter what this becomes.

Because I’ve seen this before.

Different details… same God.

So no… I don’t really do April Fool’s. Because I’ve lived long enough to know that God doesn’t play about His promises.

This isn’t April Fool’s to me. This is “His April Faithfulness.” A reminder that no matter what I face, God has always had my back.

Not always my way.
Not always my timing.
But always… faithfully.



Love, Chelle
defygravitywithoutwings.com

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The Things I Didn’t Throw Away

All my life, I’ve collected broken things.

Toys missing pieces.
Tools that didn’t quite work right anymore.
People… especially people.

Not because I didn’t notice what was wrong.
But because I could still see what was there.

I think my favorite rescue was a Christmas ornament—
a little elf on skis… missing one leg.

He couldn’t glide like he was made to.
Couldn’t balance like the others on the tree.
But I kept him anyway.

Hung him where he could still be seen.

Then there was that little robot suncatcher.
The one that doesn’t dance anymore
because his color panel is worn down.

He just… stands there now.
Still catching light, just differently.

And just this week, I stood in a nursery
while someone said, “Don’t buy those.
They’ll only last a week.”

Tulips on the clearance rack.
Already on their way out.
And I thought, a week of beauty is still beauty.


So I bought what I could afford.
Not to save them forever…
just to enjoy them while they’re here.

I’ve never been drawn to perfect things.
Perfect things don’t need you.

But worn things? They need a little time.
A little patience. A little belief that they’re not finished yet.

And somewhere along the way, I decided this:
Just because something doesn’t work the way it used to… doesn’t mean it has no use at all.

Sometimes it just needs a different kind of care.
A slower hand.
A softer place to land.
Someone willing to stay a little longer than is convenient.

Because even the smallest things,
a crooked ornament,
a quiet presence,
a short-lived bloom,
can still add something to the world.

I’ve always believed there is a kind of invisible ledger… a quiet tally being kept.
Not of perfection. Not of productivity.

But of smiles.

And if something—anything—can still add to the smile quota of the world… then it still has value.

I’ve seen what happens when you don’t give up too quickly. I’ve ve seen people who were overlooked become the very ones who light up a room.

I’ve seen what love can do when it doesn’t rush off at the first sign of difficulty.

So if you’re feeling worn today…
set aside…
like maybe people have decided you’re too much or not enough,

Hear me:

You are not something to be discarded.
You are still capable of adding something good to this world. Even if it looks different than it used to. Even if it’s quieter than before.

Even if it’s just one smile.

And that counts more than you think.

Matthew 5:7
“Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.”

I see you — still adding to the world in quiet ways that matter more than you know.

Love, Chelle
defygravitywithoutwings.com

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Hedy Lamarr – The Beauty Who Invented The Future

(November 9, 1914 – January 19, 2000)

Sometimes the world notices the wrong thing first.

Hedy Lamarr was known throughout Hollywood as one of the most beautiful actresses of the 1940s. Her face appeared on movie posters and magazine covers, and audiences admired her elegance and glamour.

But behind the fame lived a restless and brilliant mind.

During World War II, Lamarr watched the rise of Nazi power in Europe and wanted to help the Allied cause. Working with composer George Antheil, she developed a communication system designed to guide torpedoes without enemy interference.

Their invention used a method called frequency hopping, where radio signals constantly changed channels so they could not be jammed.

At the time, the military dismissed the idea.

Years later, however, the technology behind Lamarr’s invention became the foundation for modern wireless communication. Today the same principle supports Wi-Fi, Bluetooth, and GPS systems used around the world.

There is a verse in Proverbs that reminds us, “The Lord gives wisdom; from His mouth come knowledge and understanding.”

Hedy Lamarr reminds us that wisdom often lives quietly beneath the labels the world places on us.

Sometimes the person everyone admires for one gift is carrying another gift powerful enough to shape the future.

The world may decide who you are before it knows your whole story.

Hedy Lamarr was celebrated for beauty, but her mind helped build technology that connects billions of people today.

Sometimes the gifts God gives us are not immediately recognized. But that does not make them any less powerful.

We see you, Hedy. All of you.

Steps From Our Sisters

Honoring the Women Who Marched Before Us

Curated by

Michelle Gillison-Robinson

DefyGravityWithoutWings.com

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Grace O’Malley – Pirate Queen

(c.1530 – 1603)
Sometimes history remembers kings. But occasionally the sea belongs to a queen.
Grace O’Malley, known in Ireland as Gráinne Mhaol, was born into a powerful maritime clan along Ireland’s western coast. From a young age she refused the expectations placed upon women of her time.
She learned the sea instead. Grace commanded ships, led sailors, and controlled trade routes along the rugged Irish coastline. Her fleets became legendary, and her name was spoken with both admiration and caution.
When English forces threatened her family and territory, Grace O’Malley did something almost unheard of. She sailed to England and met Queen Elizabeth I face to face.
The two women spoke as equals, negotiating the freedom of O’Malley’s son and the restoration of her lands.
There is a verse in Psalm 93 that says, “The Lord reigns… the seas have lifted up their voice.”
Grace O’Malley’s life seemed to echo that image—strong, fearless, and unafraid of powerful waters.
Sometimes courage does not wait for permission.
Sometimes it sets sail.
Strength often begins with refusing the limits others place on you.
Grace O’Malley was expected to live quietly. Instead she commanded ships and negotiated with queens.
Her story reminds us that leadership can emerge from the most unexpected places.
Sometimes the waves that try to block your path are the very waters meant to carry you forward.
Steps From Our Sisters
Honoring the Women Who Marched Before Us

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Susie King Taylor: She Served Anyway



Susie King Taylor was born enslaved in Georgia in 1848, in a world where teaching Black people to read was a crime and Black women’s labor was expected but never honored.


From a young age, Susie learned to read and write in secret. She was taught quietly, moving from place to place so no one would notice. Knowledge, for her, was not just education—it was resistance.


When the Civil War came, Susie did not wait to be invited into history.


She followed Union troops, and at just fourteen years old, she began teaching formerly enslaved soldiers and children how to read. She became the first Black woman known to openly teach formerly enslaved people in a Union camp.


She did not stop there.
Susie served as a teacher, a nurse, a laundress, and a caregiver to wounded Black soldiers. She worked in field hospitals. She tended infections. She cleaned wounds. She buried the dead. She did the work that kept soldiers alive long enough to keep fighting.


She did this without rank.
Without formal pay.
Without protection.
Without promise of recognition.
And when the war ended, the men she served alongside received pensions.
Susie did not.


Her body carried the cost of years of labor and exposure. Her hands had held dying boys. Her back bore the weight of war. Yet the government decided her service did not count.
She was victorious without reward.


In 1902, Susie King Taylor published Reminiscences of My Life in Camp with the 33rd United States Colored Troops—one of the only Civil War memoirs written by a Black woman.

She wrote because she knew that if she did not tell the story, it would be told wrong—or not at all.


She documented unequal treatment, exhaustion, racism within the Union Army, and the quiet strength required to keep serving anyway.


Recognition did not follow.
She died poor.
Her contributions remained footnotes.
Her name was largely absent from textbooks.


And yet, without women like Susie King Taylor, the war would not have been survivable for Black soldiers.


Susie King Taylor teaches us that some people do the work because it needs doing, not because they expect to be thanked.
She was not disguised like Cathay Williams.
She was not sidelined like Claudette Colvin.
She was fully visible—and still denied.


“Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters.” — Colossians 3:23


If you have ever done essential work no one wanted to name, given care without credentials, served faithfully while others were promoted, or known your contribution mattered even when systems said it didn’t—Susie King Taylor stands with you.
She served anyway.
History followed later.


We see you, Susie.
We honor you now.


Bread Crumbs — for those coming after us.
Victorious without reward. Still here.
Love, Chelle

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Claudette Colvin: Nine Months Before History Was Ready


Claudette Colvin, who died recently on January 13, 2026, was one of the last remaining living catalysts of the Montgomery Bus Boycott.


This must be said plainly:
Nine months before Rosa Parks,
a fifteen-year-old girl named Claudette Colvin refused to give up her seat on a segregated Montgomery bus.
Nine months before the cameras.
Nine months before the speeches.
Nine months before it was considered “safe.”
She was early — and she was right.


When police dragged her off the bus and arrested her, Claudette did not yet know she would be asked to step back from public view. But she would be.


Not because her courage was insufficient —
but because the movement decided she was not the face America would accept.
She was:
– a poor Black girl
– from a working-class family
– and soon after, pregnant
– struggling emotionally after trauma and arrest


Movement leaders made a strategic decision.
They chose respectability.
They chose optics.
And Claudette was quietly sidelined.
Yet her courage did not disappear.


She became one of the plaintiffs in Browder v. Gayle — the federal court case that ended bus segregation in Montgomery. The law changed because of the stand she took first, even though her name was not lifted alongside the victory.
She was victorious without reward.


Claudette Colvin teaches us a truth history often resists:
Being first does not mean being credited.
Being right does not mean being chosen.
And being faithful does not guarantee being celebrated.
A poor Black girl,
a pregnant teenager,
a traumatized child —
said no to injustice nine months before the nation was ready to listen.


That is not a footnote.
That is a foundation.
“For God chose what the world considers foolish to shame the wise.” — 1 Corinthians 1:27


If you have ever stood up too early,
told the truth before it was popular,
been asked to step aside so the story could be cleaner,
or watched others be celebrated for a door you opened,
hear this clearly:
Your timing was not wrong.
Your courage was not wasted.
And your obedience still counts.


Claudette Colvin stood first.
History followed later.
We see you, Claudette.
We tell it right now.
We honor you fully.


Bread Crumbs — for those coming after us.
Victorious without reward. Still here.


Love, Chelle